2002-09-23

goals and other piddley crap

How many months is it until 2003? 3 months if we don�t count this month�which we won�t. GAH. 2002 has tormented me long enough. I am ready for this stinkin� year to be over and done with.

Everything bad that could happen baring someone dying has happened. Minnie knocks her desk for good luck�even thought it�s not really wood.

My wedding was a bright spot but hell that only lasted 5 hours.

I want to take a nap and wake up on January 1, 2003. It will be a shiny new year full of sunshine, lollipops, and kittens.

I want smooth sailing and wide-open spaces and bags full of cash! I want be done with the crap�.and something is telling me that it�s not quite over yet.

Today�s bad mood is brought to you by R & J�s divorce! I was the witness today for the deposition. To prove to the legal system that the above parties have indeed been living apart and harboring great dislike for each other for no less than 6 months.

I hurt Ian�s feelings last night by being completely honest with him about his job and other things that can�t be discussed in my wittle diary here. I�m just trying so very hard to not be a controlling byotch. I�m trying so hard that I�m making myself ill. My contestant worrying about things beyond my control is why my IBS has been acting up again. I LIVED in the bathroom this weekend. My doctors say unless I can develop away to let go and relax they are going to put me on paxil. I do NOT want to take any psychotropic drugs for this silly thing I�ve developed.

I can fix this by concentrating on what I know I can change. I made a list of goals yesterday consisting of things I can have an affect on:

Weight loss goals

Educational goals

Neatness goal.

I�m now focusing on becoming a thin, college graduate who is an amazing housekeeper.

Oh lord�maybe I do need drugs?